Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Seriously Lord? You want ME to be a "blogger"?

Anyone that knows me, knows that I am not short on words. Some people have asked me if I had a blog and have been "shocked" that I (until today) did not! However, when I recently put on facebook that I wanted information on blogging I received both "sweet"/encouraging information AND comments like "Oh my us!"

But - this blogging idea, I truly believe, is not my own.

Two weeks ago, as we were preparing for our oldest daughter to marry her prince (my son-in-law ROCKS), my husband was fired from his job of several years. I could use a "prettier" word to describe it but - let's stick with the was a FIRING! While we were not completely surprised (it hadn't been "great" since he obtained a new boss 3 months earlier), we considered the timing (3 days before the wedding) to "stink" (I might be tempted to use another word but - my mom will probably read this!!). Since our goal with the wedding had been to have it be "God honoring and FUN", we decided to focus on the event and "freak out" the following Tuesday - after everyone left down and the event was over!

My first offical "freak out moment" actually didn't occure until exactly two weeks later....I was driving to work and it was the first time that FEAR (of the unknown timeline) gripped me and the tears began to flow. I found myself admitting to God that I wasn't "happy" with this new plan and wondered why we were going through it see, we have been down this road twice before...once for 8 months and once for 10. I had "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, learned a lot and MOVED on!" As I cried out to the Lord and asked "why?", I immediately heard (not outloud - just sweetly in my head), "Cause I want you to share with others what you have learned...and I might just teach you something new along the way." :)

Immediately I thought, "How am I going to share those things with others? I've always been vocal about how You provided during that time...the miraculous ways You loved/supported/provided for us though miracles and other people...what do You want me to do? Use my status updates on facebook?" (some might be tempted to call me a "facebook junkie"!)

Without a single second going by, "Blog" came to my mind. Again, I've never seriously thought of blogging...didn't know a thing about setting one up...and to be honest - really only follow 2 people that do it. But - God put an excitement in my heart to start!

Even if NO ONE ever reads an entry - I know that I would be dis-obedient if I didn't do this. I know that God asked me to keep record of this journey we are on....AGAIN. I know that I'm to fall deeper in love with Him as our PROVIDER...and I know that I'm to make it available to encourage others. God taught me a lot the first two times...mostly about being a support to my husband (what to do/what not to do) and that GOD IS GOOD - ALL THE TIME (even when we can't see His plan).

So...God - this is for with it what YOU will. My desire is to honor you and obey. I will be honest (not that I have to tell you - as you know my heart already but...I'll put it in writing anyway) that there might be days or weeks that all I can do is say "This stinks" or "Ugh". It's in those moments that I'll trust that you will show up BIG you ALWAYS have!

Oh my gosh...I'm officially a "blogger"! :)